If you don’t get lost, you’ll never be found. If you never lose, you can never win. If you don’t fail, you won’t succeed.
In a world of emoticons and abbreviated letters substituting for words the above phrases seem like quaint things a middle-aged man says as he laments by-gone glory days. Well, I am a middle-aged man but fortunately I never had glory days so I can’t lament.
Those phrases mean more in the scheme of things than most of us care to acknowledge. As parents, we want to minimize the bumps along the road for our children but it seems we rob them of the chance to grow by failing. No one grows in success. They enjoy it. They flaunt it. They never truly appreciate it and they most certainly do not learn anything from it.
The unintended consequence of this good intention is unprepared children for the harsh realities of life. Much like death and taxes no one can escape reality. The sooner children learn not everyone wins, succeeds or gets what they want the better adjusted they will be to take Life’s short journey.
Ironically, by trying to shield our children from failing we fail as parents. It doesn’t matter how hard we try we can’t make life fair. The only place you will find fair is in the dictionary. I suspect most of us inherently believe this truth but the old college try is in our DNA.
As a nation, we need leaders who recognize this fact and govern accordingly. For example, there are some public schools in our nation that no longer offer honors courses because they do not want the children in the “normal” classes to feel unworthy. These students go through an education system that rewards “good enough” and ignores furthering achievement. Yet, these same students then face an unforgiving Corporate America that demands “go-getters.”
The incongruity is startling not so much for the lack of common sense but that it perpetuates in each generation.
It’s the same stupidity in youth sports. Everyone gets a participation trophy so they don’t feel bad about not winning. Here’s the dirty little secret: the kids who get the participation know they lost. But here is the tragic secret: The kids also know the adults are lying to them. In our haste to protect what we think are the fragile egos of children, we ruin our integrity with those same children.
Other than the fact they are all crooks, is it any wonder why no one believes politicians? The real lesson being taught is we can’t believe the authority figures. I suggest if we let the children fail, they will find their way out of the labyrinth of their doubts. It can happen. Maybe this video will help you understand http://youtu.be/zLYECIjmnQs.